Motherhood is an incredible journey, at times you feel like you are standing on the tallest mountain taking in a breath-taking view and there are times when you feel lost in the deepest valley, with no way out. There is no manual and we may be triggered on our journey by the way we may have been parented causing our childhood memories and wounds to surface. When this happens, it is an opportunity to heal and re-write the past. This does take practice though as when you feel yourself triggered by something your child is doing, it is your inner child that is rising up and needs to be nurtured. Our parents were doing the best they could with what they knew. When you become a mother, you have the power to parent your own way, to heal past experiences that need to be healed so they aren’t passed on to your children and to find your own way.

I would like to share some of the lessons I have learnt on my journey as a mother of three girls.

1. There will be good days and not so good days and that is OK.

2. Get enough sleep. It is amazing how little sleep mothers can survive on but try and get as much as you can. Go to bed earlier and sleep when your little one sleeps. Chores and cleaning can wait, focus on what you need to be the best you can be and sleep is one of those things!

3. Don’t compare yourself to others. Your chapter 1 may be someone else’s chapter 20, it is like comparing apples and oranges. You are unique so focus on your journey, take inspiration from others but don’t feel less than.

4. You are good enough, even when you feel like you aren’t!

5. Be present. Give your full attention to what you are doing. Don’t be distracted by your phone if you are with your child or taking your baby for a walk. Experience what they experience. I remember seeing a mother taking her baby for a walk with her baby facing her in the pram. She was on her phone and she missed her baby’s expression of wonder seeing the sunlight come through the leaves of a tree. Don’t miss these beautiful moments.

6. Don’t multitask, it doesn’t work. All it does is make you feel overwhelmed as you will invariably forget that you left something on the stove while you go off to hang up washing or help your child with their schoolwork (yes, I speak from experience). Do one thing at a time and give it your full attention, then move on to the next thing.

7. When your child is talking to you, go down to their level and look them in the eye. Let them have your full attention.

8. Never be too busy for a hug.

9. Don’t juggle too much or you will end up dropping some balls.

10. Self-care is essential, it is not a luxury that you do once in a while. It is absolutely necessary for your sanity and should be practiced every day. It doesn’t have to be something big, but make some time for yourself everyday even if it’s a few moments to connect with yourself and breathe. It is also an important lesson to teach your children, the importance of taking care of themselves.

11. Enjoy every stage of motherhood. It may get harder as your child gets older and goes through different stages, but there is beautiful growth for both of you in this.

12. Slow down and prioritise what is important to you, otherwise it will fly by too quickly and you will have regrets.

13. Make plenty of time to play and have fun and reconnect with your inner child. As adults we can be too serious.

14. Don’t over plan your time as this will lead to overwhelm.

15. You do not have to entertain your child 24/7. It is good for them to be bored as it stimulates their imagination. They will figure it out.

16. You are allowed to have other interests outside of your children and family. Your dreams matter.

17. When you find your own childhood wounds being triggered, work on them so they can heal. This will break the cycle and stop you passing them on to your children and so on.

18. Make time to see life through the eyes of a child, it is a magical place!

19. Be gentle with yourself, you are doing the best you can and that is enough.

I'm sure there will be many more lessons to learn on my journey which I look forward to.

What is the biggest lesson you have learnt (so far) being a mother?

If there is anything I can do to help you on your journey, please do get in touch.

With love,